I had a thought about Shmonei Esrei yesterday.
When we say ברוך אתה ה’
– the flow of Hashem’s blessing on us, TOP DOWN
My God, and empowerer/ my worthiness and flow of חלק אלוקי ממעל
ME IN THE CENTER
ZECHUS AVOS BEHIND US
אלוקי אברהם – חסד-
TO THE RIGHT OF ME
TO THE LEFT OF ME
IN FRONT OF ME,
It ends up being like a protective container all around me that I can remain in throughout Shmonei Esrei.
And the finishing brocha of
Is the Chesed of Hashem that can stay present throughout the time that I stay in this container and daven.
Yesterday at Shmonei Esrei my mind sadly wandered off for moments , thinking about a person. I then felt this deep insight that standing before Hashem and thinking of a person while saying the words may very well be avoda Zora רח”ל.
So I then thought of the beginning of Shmonei Esrei and saw it as a protective container.
I thought of using it as a kavana to have in mind throughout Shmonei Esrei as in seeing myself stay in that container, so I remember who I’m standing for.